My wife and I just got back from a wonderful weekend of fellowship. After 1.5 years of preparation we were finally able to launch the Building Tomorrow’s Church Conference in Prescott, Arizona. The result was an awesome time of prayer, learning, fellowship, and laughter.  God is moving mightily among this generation of young adults.  I am excited to see what He does in the lives of the conference participants this year and beyond. Many thanks go out to everyone who was involved and participated in making this conference a reality. I put together a video of our time in together, which should give you an idea of what the conference is about. You can view the video here.  Start making plans to attend next year-we’ll see you at BTC 2009!

I receive e-mails from focus on the family which are geared specifically to the recently married crowd. I love these emails- there is lots of practical advice and some really good resources. Generally the content featured in these emails is very helpful and Christ-centered. However, I did notice one book review description that bugged me quite a bit in today’s email. It was a book geared toward Christians who have been married before. I am not contesting that there exists a Biblical basis for remarriage in extreme (notice the wording… extreme… as in: unfaithfulness with a refusal to come under church leadership!) situations. However, I am contesting the wording of this book, it went as follows:

“Whether it’s you or your spouse who has been married before, the principles and guidance in Happily Remarried can help you beat the odds and make your re-marriage a success.”

Beat the odds? I’m sorry, but the sentiment of this wording really irks me as a Christian. I once received this advice prior to my own marriage. One, well-meaning man, used these words: “Stephen, if you do the research now and try to lead your life according to scripture, it will help you beat the odds of a failed marriage.”

Whoa- back that up. I would vehemently say ‘no!’ to that my friends. All the research and preparation in the world will not save your marriage from failing. If that’s your strategy, get ready to fail and fall hard. Nothing in and of your own power will save your marriage.

Let me tell you what will ‘save’ your marriage- an utter dependence upon God. A reliance upon Him that refuses to let go of His promises even in the darkest of times. We shouldn’t have to ‘beat the odds’ with our marriages as Christians. There are no ‘odds’ for a marriage truly rooted in Christ alone! What there should be, is a confident expectation that God will give you the strength to endure and persevere through any trial that you may encounter together. Yes, we are married to fellow sinners, that much is true. However, that does not give us the liberty to abort our marriages as if they were some plan that ‘just didn’t happen to work out’. It is unsettling how many people (and many who are supposed Christians!) are willing to throw away their marriage at the faintest sign of trouble. What a marring of a beautiful ordinance that Christ has given us! Imagine if Christ simply chose to abort His love to the church? Let the gravity of this sink in: He chose to dedicate Himself to a tainted bride (the story of Hosea and Gomer comes to mind- check it out). If anyone had an excuse to ‘let go’, wasn’t it Christ? Thank God we have a dedicated Savior- one who does not flee us or reject us despite our unfaithfulness to Him!

“The Lord did not set his affection on you and choose you because you were more numerous than other peoples, for you were the fewest of all peoples. But it was because the Lord loved you and kept the oath he swore to your forefathers that he brought you out with a mighty hand and redeemed you from the land of slavery, from the power of Pharaoh king of Egypt. Know therefore that the Lord your God is God; he is the faithful God, keeping his covenant of love to a thousand generations of those who love him and keep his commands.” - Deut 7:7-9

So what’s the exhortation? Buckle down my friends! Face sin head on with Christ by your side. Don’t shy away from His grace or look for the easy way out. May we guard the sanctity of marriage as Christians who refuse to be like the world. With Christ you don’t have to beat the odds, He has already overcome them.

A Footnote: I do not write this post in an attempt to discourage anyone who has had the unfortunate experience of an unfaithful spouse who has refused to be reconciled or come under the authority of the local church. Indeed- my heart goes out to you. This is not a hammer over the head of those who faithfully seek reconciliation through Christ while their partner does not. This post is for those who consciously and willingly thrust aside a hope for reconciliation in their marriage.

As a general rule, I loathe complaining (even my own complaining). It’s especially hard for me to read blogs full of complaining… what a major drag to read. So with that in mind I simply wanted to post the things that I’m thankful to God for.

I am so very thankful for my beautiful, compassionate, caring wife, who, above all else is my friend and companion for life. I am refreshed (and sometimes humbled) by her honesty. I know that she loves me without requirement and will continue to do so regardless of the circumstances. In the same way I know that I love her without requirement and will continue to do so no matter what the circumstances. She is quick to forgive and quick to apologize. She is so much fun to laugh and do the simplest of things with. I love that she doesn’t have to be doing much just as long as she is doing it with me. She is the most beautiful girl I know and I’m so very proud to call her my wife.

I am so thankful for my family. Celeste and I spent some time with my extended family last week up in Payson for the 4th of July. It was such a blast and so relaxing! God has done something special with our family… my aunts, uncles, and cousins are all so very close. We tend to have the same sense of humor whilst maintaining our unique, distinct personalities. Growing up I never really appreciated how rare this is… to be able to have this abundant love for your relatives and to count the days off in anticipation of seeing them all again. My parents are amazing- so patient, so kind. They exhibit love in every aspect of their lives and their support for their sons knows no bounds. I’m thankful for the way they’ve welcomed Celeste to our wacky family and the love that they shower her with a well- she loves them so much too! And my brother… what can I say? He’s a classy guy! I will never understand why people peg him as ‘the quiet one’ at times. He has one of the biggest (and funniest) personalities I know and can be quite outspoken at times. He is a constant friend and is gifted in his discernment and the choices he makes. He is an individual who can admit when he is wrong and defend himself when he is right, something I find incredibly refreshing.

I am thankful for my friends. David, Darryl, Garrett- you make me laugh harder than I thought possible and your creativity inspires me always! Our college and career group is a constant source of encouragement- I am so proud of the young men and woman that God has lead to be in our group. They exhibit His grace and love in their lives in many varying ways. I feel that we have been truly blessed with a non-judgmental group, which again is extremely refreshing to me.

I am thankful for my job. Oh what a joy to be able to be thankful for one’s place of work! On more than one occasion I have heard people speak of how they loathe their jobs. This concept has yet to enter my mind. I love what I do, I love the people I work with, and I love what we are doing as an organization. Food for the Hungry has indeed been a blessing in my life. No matter how crazy (and it is crazy right now!) it gets, I am never ungrateful or unsatisfied with my position. How great is it to be able to go to work and pray with your co-workers? How amazing is it to be able to use the Bible as your code and ethics manual?

There are of course many other things that I am thankful for (a roof over my head, food, transportation, health, etc.), but these are the things that come to mind. I hope that you all are doing well and remembering to count your blessings! God has given us so much- may we never forget that in the end we deserve nothing… thus, every good thing in our lives is a blessing and more than we deserve. God is awesome!

First off, let me say that the post preceding this one (edit: I took down the old post as I’ve now been convicted that its posting was a mistake- message me if you really want to read it still!) suffered from two things specifically: 1) I was emotionally charged having come off of a somewhat-heated debate with another individual which clouded my judgment and 2) it was made without revising or rereading before posting which would have made clear the many inconsistencies that obviously existed. To be honest- I pretty much puked out a mess of random thoughts and feelings into a blog posting- my bad.

The Christian liberty points made in that post were not only unbiblical, but also didn’t connect to the subject being discussed. In fact, the previous post brought up quite a few sentiments that just plain old didn’t make sense; it was chocked full rabbit-trails into nothingness. Thanks to those of you who had the presence of mind to call me out on it: it’s a reminder for me to let myself cool off and write in an objective environment before gushing a mess of unconnected thoughts onto the page. I definitely needed to heed the advice of James 1:19, “Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath…” In my case I broke every one of these: I was slow to hear, quick to speak, and quick to anger.

I am humbled by your words of encouragement to rethink my position. I fear that I made the childish mistake of being passionate just for the sake of being passionate. In the end I just came off as overzealous and under-supported in my position.

I hope you can forgive my blatant oversight. Allow me to more accurately and concisely convey what I meant to say in the previous post. Here’s what I should have said…

The rising gas prices have caught my attention. However, instead of looking at them as a terrible thing, I’ve come to realize that God’s purposes are always higher than our own. It may be that God has allowed such things to happen so that we pay better attention to our call to be good stewards of what He has given us. I know that the rising prices have caused me personally to evaluate what type of steward I am being with what he has given me.

I have been convicted of my own smug attitudes as well with regards to what I have been made a steward over. How often do I take for granted what I have been given? We are nothing without the grace and support of our loving Father. May we treat everything (including money, gas, this earth, etc.) that we have been made a steward over as a miraculous blessing from God and not take for granted all that he has blessed his undeserving children with!

God is real my friends- I know this to be true. I have experienced His healing and changing grace in my own life time and time again. Occasionally I will write out my prayers to Him… it helps me to focus on what I really want to say with my heart as opposed to what oftentimes comes out of my mouth. I was recently feeling that life was becoming very ‘noisy’. I’m not sure how to explain this, other than to say that if you’ve ever been able to identify the events surrounding your life as ‘too loud’, I’m sure you understand. I hope that by sharing these personal thoughts, I can be some sort of encouragement to you in your own walk… or, if you do not know the Lord as your saving Father, that this will provide some small insight into why He is the only way to salvation and peace.

Dear Father, it’s so loud right now. The decibels of life seem to be cranking up higher and higher. I confess- I miss the silence. I miss the quiet, still moments of reflection and solitude that I once knew more intimately. Noises, loud noises seem to be clanking and stirring in every direction now: discomfort, complaining, and some noises not so driven by dissatisfaction, but noises nonetheless. They feel so constricting and yet, for all their disruptive and invasive nature, they creep in unnoticed. The noises drown out vision and creativity; those voices that I rely on to speak refreshment to the soul. I can’t hear them as well now- they are indistinct, faint. I feel it almost a farce to be sentimental, sweet, or philosophical. The loud noises are unpredictable and harsh. I try to be vulnerable and speak a quiet word, but the noises glare and smash like waves of needles into the calm I so desperately strive to create. My reaction is to pull back and scream in defiance, but even my own reaction only adds to the noise. I just want it to be quiet, so I stop reacting. I just sit down and shut up.

But oh, what a bad way to approach things! It’s complacency, its indifference, it’s a releasing of oneself to defeat. This is not the way you’ve called me to be my God, this is not what your holy, quiet words have spoken to me in the silence of my mind. Your words are soft, yes, but powerful; gentle answers that can shape worlds and split open the mountains like soft wax. Your quiet words of power call me to rise above the noise, to soar on the wings of your promises and strength and to look defeat in the face and refuse to be mastered by it. God you have given me a voice to loudly proclaim your name. May I never use it to screech in protest when things seem to be shaping in a way not derived from my own sinful desires. God you are my solitude in time of winter. You provide me with a sanctuary of silence amidst the loudest, most abrasive moments of my life. You are love and justice, a great tandem of power, the like of which has no equal in this universe. Great and mighty is your name! When I cry to you, you answer me. You command your creation to be silent and know you. I love you father- may you continue to teach me to place my reliance and faith solely in the palm of your hands. Amen.